This is also the last date before Opening Day at Heckscher Field in Central Park on April 11th. Come get some hitting in while searching for Easter eggs!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
EASTER SOFTBALL
Yes, SFLOI will be playing this Sunday at Zinsser Park in Hastings @ 10:00AM. As always Havelock will be making pick-ups at 96th Street at 9:15am sharp!
This is also the last date before Opening Day at Heckscher Field in Central Park on April 11th. Come get some hitting in while searching for Easter eggs!
This is also the last date before Opening Day at Heckscher Field in Central Park on April 11th. Come get some hitting in while searching for Easter eggs!
Monday, March 29, 2010
The Records Dep't: How We Got Here
Provided the weather and the pitchers cooperate, I fully expect several more single-season hitting records to join Phil Kotik's 25-HR mark by the wayside in 2010. First-- the possible record breakers: Ian, Alex, Zach, Freddy, Derek, and perhaps Bill McLaughlin, off to a 19-for-33 start in 2010. Second-- the records being threatened: Hits, runs, RBI, doubles. Lastly, how we got here.
Single season hits. Joe Gerber had 139 in 1995. Larry Savell held the record for only one year, when he had 132 hits in 1994. He superseded Phil Kotik, who had 116 hits in 1992. Phil was SFLOI's first 100-hit man, and he took the hit record from Jorge Loarte, who had 84 in 1990. Before that, the record belonged to Gary Alvarez (1989), Bobby Naranjo (1988), John Decker (1986), and the commish, Havelock Hewes (1985). Ian Parfrey (now referring to himself in the 3rd person) came closest to breaking Gerber's mark with 134 hits last season.
Runs scored. Joe Gerber scored 103 runs in 1995. Phil Kotik scored 95 times in 1992, Bobby Naranjo 74 times in 1991, breaking his own records set in 1990 and 1988. Earlier record holders were John Decker (1986) and Havelock (1985). Bill Vernick's 99-run campaign in 1998 was the best attempt since Gerber's record.
RBI. Larry Savell drove in 92 in 1994. This broke Kurt Hettler's 1992 record of 84 RBI, which broke Jeff Miller's 1991 record (59 RBI), which broke Jose Balento's 1990 record (56 RBI). Earlier record holders were Gary Alvarez (1989), Jose Balento (1988), Bill Weinberg (1987 and 1986), and Joe Picciano (1985). Jose Balento almost took back the record when he drove in 88 runs in 1999.
Doubles. Phil Kotik had 34 in 1992. The only other 30-double season was Joe Gerber in 1995. The doubles record had belonged to John Decker (25 in 1986), breaking his own record from 1984. Doubles totals were very high in the early years of SFLOI. Was this due to a ground rule and a short fence?
And-- as a bonus feature, I present the SFLOI record that fell, and the one that's almost unbreakable. Derek Martinez hit 26 home runs in 2009, breaking Kotik's record of 25 (1995), which broke Kurt Hettler's record of 23 (1992), Jeff Miller's 11 (1991), and Jose Balento's 9 (1988). Prior to that, the record belonged to Joe Signore, who crushed 7 home runs in 22 at bats in 1987. Dave Metzger had 6 in 1986, and Joe Picciano hit 3 in 1985. Derek, by the way, broke Kotik's record on the last day of the season, with a line drive down the RF line at Hastings #2, and then he ran the bases backwards.
Lastly, in 2000, Larry Savell had 66 hits in 106 at-bats, for an average of .623. SFLOI played a significantly shorter season, so he was eligible for the batting title. In 1998, Joe Gerber had been 90-for-146 (.616), which broke Bill Weinberg's .605 mark, set in 1983. In 2006, Phil Ciccone was 64-for-106 (.604), and this has been the strongest challenge to Savell's record. Notice that all of these seasons are small samples. None of the .600 hitters batted 150 times. The highest batting average ever in 200+ at-bats is .565, by Carl Weinberg. I don't expect anyone will ever break Larry's record. Even Alex Rivera.
Single season hits. Joe Gerber had 139 in 1995. Larry Savell held the record for only one year, when he had 132 hits in 1994. He superseded Phil Kotik, who had 116 hits in 1992. Phil was SFLOI's first 100-hit man, and he took the hit record from Jorge Loarte, who had 84 in 1990. Before that, the record belonged to Gary Alvarez (1989), Bobby Naranjo (1988), John Decker (1986), and the commish, Havelock Hewes (1985). Ian Parfrey (now referring to himself in the 3rd person) came closest to breaking Gerber's mark with 134 hits last season.
Runs scored. Joe Gerber scored 103 runs in 1995. Phil Kotik scored 95 times in 1992, Bobby Naranjo 74 times in 1991, breaking his own records set in 1990 and 1988. Earlier record holders were John Decker (1986) and Havelock (1985). Bill Vernick's 99-run campaign in 1998 was the best attempt since Gerber's record.
RBI. Larry Savell drove in 92 in 1994. This broke Kurt Hettler's 1992 record of 84 RBI, which broke Jeff Miller's 1991 record (59 RBI), which broke Jose Balento's 1990 record (56 RBI). Earlier record holders were Gary Alvarez (1989), Jose Balento (1988), Bill Weinberg (1987 and 1986), and Joe Picciano (1985). Jose Balento almost took back the record when he drove in 88 runs in 1999.
Doubles. Phil Kotik had 34 in 1992. The only other 30-double season was Joe Gerber in 1995. The doubles record had belonged to John Decker (25 in 1986), breaking his own record from 1984. Doubles totals were very high in the early years of SFLOI. Was this due to a ground rule and a short fence?
And-- as a bonus feature, I present the SFLOI record that fell, and the one that's almost unbreakable. Derek Martinez hit 26 home runs in 2009, breaking Kotik's record of 25 (1995), which broke Kurt Hettler's record of 23 (1992), Jeff Miller's 11 (1991), and Jose Balento's 9 (1988). Prior to that, the record belonged to Joe Signore, who crushed 7 home runs in 22 at bats in 1987. Dave Metzger had 6 in 1986, and Joe Picciano hit 3 in 1985. Derek, by the way, broke Kotik's record on the last day of the season, with a line drive down the RF line at Hastings #2, and then he ran the bases backwards.
Lastly, in 2000, Larry Savell had 66 hits in 106 at-bats, for an average of .623. SFLOI played a significantly shorter season, so he was eligible for the batting title. In 1998, Joe Gerber had been 90-for-146 (.616), which broke Bill Weinberg's .605 mark, set in 1983. In 2006, Phil Ciccone was 64-for-106 (.604), and this has been the strongest challenge to Savell's record. Notice that all of these seasons are small samples. None of the .600 hitters batted 150 times. The highest batting average ever in 200+ at-bats is .565, by Carl Weinberg. I don't expect anyone will ever break Larry's record. Even Alex Rivera.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
THIS WEEK IN SFLOI
1. As some of you already know, veteran pitcher Dave Rosengard had a heart attack last week. He is doing well, and is expected to be home by midweek. Wishing you a speedy recovery, Dave!
2. Dues are $30 for the season and can be paid to Secretary of the Treasury Gil Schmerler.
3. The Easter weekend will be our last in Westchester. We may play Saturday, we may play Sunday. Zinsser Park is the probable location.
4. Recaps of Sunday 3/28:
Game 1-- Hewes 12, Martinez 5
Havelock had another good outing, backed by Zach Nilva's 3-for-3, 4-RBI game. Zach's 3-run triple broke a 3-3 tie, and Hewes's team never looked back.
Game 2-- Parfrey 24, O'Connor 16
Both teams scored 7 times in the 1st inning of this slugfest. Parfrey's team scored 5 times in the 5th and blew it open with 8 more in the 7th. The big play of this game was Carl Weinberg singling into a double play in the 6th inning. O'Connor's team was threatening, with first and second and none out. Carl lined a single up the middle, and Mike Sulyman got hung up between second and third. He slid back into second, and appeared to be out, though as later events would prove, he had been called safe. Nate Sillman broke for the plate and was thrown out. Carl advanced to second on the throw, and now there were two runners on second! Carl was tagged out returning to first. Derek Martinez led O'Connor's team, going 3-for-4 with 3 RBI, and the winners were paced by Freddy Melendez's 4-for-4, 6-RBI performance, Robert Rodriguez Sr's homer and 6 RBI, and Parfrey's 3 hits and 4 RBI.
2. Dues are $30 for the season and can be paid to Secretary of the Treasury Gil Schmerler.
3. The Easter weekend will be our last in Westchester. We may play Saturday, we may play Sunday. Zinsser Park is the probable location.
4. Recaps of Sunday 3/28:
Game 1-- Hewes 12, Martinez 5
Havelock had another good outing, backed by Zach Nilva's 3-for-3, 4-RBI game. Zach's 3-run triple broke a 3-3 tie, and Hewes's team never looked back.
Game 2-- Parfrey 24, O'Connor 16
Both teams scored 7 times in the 1st inning of this slugfest. Parfrey's team scored 5 times in the 5th and blew it open with 8 more in the 7th. The big play of this game was Carl Weinberg singling into a double play in the 6th inning. O'Connor's team was threatening, with first and second and none out. Carl lined a single up the middle, and Mike Sulyman got hung up between second and third. He slid back into second, and appeared to be out, though as later events would prove, he had been called safe. Nate Sillman broke for the plate and was thrown out. Carl advanced to second on the throw, and now there were two runners on second! Carl was tagged out returning to first. Derek Martinez led O'Connor's team, going 3-for-4 with 3 RBI, and the winners were paced by Freddy Melendez's 4-for-4, 6-RBI performance, Robert Rodriguez Sr's homer and 6 RBI, and Parfrey's 3 hits and 4 RBI.
Monday, March 22, 2010
RECAPS OF SUNDAY's GAMES
With unseasonably warm and beautiful weather, Zinsser Park in Hastings was packed to the gills with softballers. We had a near-record 27 players in Game 2.
Game 1
O'Connor 21, Rosengard 18
Jim's team built a quick 16-5 lead and then had to sweat it out, as the Rosengarders stormed back with a 9-run 5th inning to close within 17-16 before Alex Rivera (3-for-3, 3 RBI) tripled to key a 4-run rally that proved to be decisive. Ken Walker also drove in three runs for the winning side. Ian Parfrey had a home run and 5 RBI for the losing team. Freddy Melendez added a home run, Joe Geller drove in 3 runs, and Sal Cipriano was 3-for-4 with 2 RBI.
Game 2
Hewes 11, Melendez 5
Havelock was sharp in his first outing since the Massacre at Riverdale, scattering 11 hits and allowing very little after a 3-run first inning. Freddy matched him until a 6th inning defensive collapse led to 7 runs scoring. The winning team was led by Rich Rowlands and Alex Rivera (2-for-3, 2 doubles each). Parfrey was 3-for-3 with an RBI and a boneheaded baserunning mistake for the losers.
Game 1
O'Connor 21, Rosengard 18
Jim's team built a quick 16-5 lead and then had to sweat it out, as the Rosengarders stormed back with a 9-run 5th inning to close within 17-16 before Alex Rivera (3-for-3, 3 RBI) tripled to key a 4-run rally that proved to be decisive. Ken Walker also drove in three runs for the winning side. Ian Parfrey had a home run and 5 RBI for the losing team. Freddy Melendez added a home run, Joe Geller drove in 3 runs, and Sal Cipriano was 3-for-4 with 2 RBI.
Game 2
Hewes 11, Melendez 5
Havelock was sharp in his first outing since the Massacre at Riverdale, scattering 11 hits and allowing very little after a 3-run first inning. Freddy matched him until a 6th inning defensive collapse led to 7 runs scoring. The winning team was led by Rich Rowlands and Alex Rivera (2-for-3, 2 doubles each). Parfrey was 3-for-3 with an RBI and a boneheaded baserunning mistake for the losers.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
COHEN'S CONCOCTIONS #6
POSTERITY SCORNS ITS FAME-SMITTEN SUITOR
So the long-retired ballplayer dies. His egocentric ghost tries to grab posthumous fame-mongering admiration from the current generation of fans and players. Well, good luck to that enterprising ghost, who hires a live-wire publicity agent, who sends long-ago statistical reminders to all the media outlets: which fails to make an impression enough to get printed notices, because when alive the ghost client's major-league career topped off at mediocre. No fielding award, no hitting award, no post-season appearance, add up to forgettableness, especially given the current generation's attention-span disorder, creating the phenomenon known as oblivion. The ghost's egocentricity is grandiosely way out of its depth in trying to rouse remembrance of long-ago non-heroics. None of his contemporaries is alive to contribute any remembering, so historical archives would have to be pointed out, which gathers total indifference among callous posterity. For that old ballplayer to try to fame-hype a career via his wealthy ghost's hiring a "look-down-the-ages" agent, just doesn't seem to work. Death is ignoble enough, but to add a deficiency of fame glory to the dirty dust of coffined skeletal decay is what you'd call "piling on," unanswerable by death's smothered passivity. So the ghost flees, and nothing's left, except the hired agent who takes his commissioned fee, unmerrily, to the bank.
Marvin Cohen is the author of several books including Baseball The Beautiful (1974) and a former creative writing teacher at the New School. Marvin plays first base for Softball For The Love Of It.
So the long-retired ballplayer dies. His egocentric ghost tries to grab posthumous fame-mongering admiration from the current generation of fans and players. Well, good luck to that enterprising ghost, who hires a live-wire publicity agent, who sends long-ago statistical reminders to all the media outlets: which fails to make an impression enough to get printed notices, because when alive the ghost client's major-league career topped off at mediocre. No fielding award, no hitting award, no post-season appearance, add up to forgettableness, especially given the current generation's attention-span disorder, creating the phenomenon known as oblivion. The ghost's egocentricity is grandiosely way out of its depth in trying to rouse remembrance of long-ago non-heroics. None of his contemporaries is alive to contribute any remembering, so historical archives would have to be pointed out, which gathers total indifference among callous posterity. For that old ballplayer to try to fame-hype a career via his wealthy ghost's hiring a "look-down-the-ages" agent, just doesn't seem to work. Death is ignoble enough, but to add a deficiency of fame glory to the dirty dust of coffined skeletal decay is what you'd call "piling on," unanswerable by death's smothered passivity. So the ghost flees, and nothing's left, except the hired agent who takes his commissioned fee, unmerrily, to the bank.
Marvin Cohen is the author of several books including Baseball The Beautiful (1974) and a former creative writing teacher at the New School. Marvin plays first base for Softball For The Love Of It.
Friday, March 12, 2010
Parfrey and Martinez Declared Co-MVP's
Dear Players,
Assigned the task of recasting his ballot using the criteria of performance, Seung Lee voted as follows...Ian Parfrey (3 pts), Derek Martinez (2 pts) and Alex Rivera (1 pt). The final point count is 42 points for Parfrey and 42 points for Martinez. Also, Seung changed his gold glove vote at shortstop to Sommers, giving David the Gold Glove at shortstop. Parfrey and Martinez are co-MVP's for 2009.
In my last missive I gave alcohol and excessive attention to child-rearing as possible reasons for Seung's error in judgment. I was not basing this on any observation of such behavior. I was merely giving Seung possible excuses (alcohol was served and Mycroft was there). Seung was not drinking at the party.
See you on the ballfield! -Havelock
Assigned the task of recasting his ballot using the criteria of performance, Seung Lee voted as follows...Ian Parfrey (3 pts), Derek Martinez (2 pts) and Alex Rivera (1 pt). The final point count is 42 points for Parfrey and 42 points for Martinez. Also, Seung changed his gold glove vote at shortstop to Sommers, giving David the Gold Glove at shortstop. Parfrey and Martinez are co-MVP's for 2009.
In my last missive I gave alcohol and excessive attention to child-rearing as possible reasons for Seung's error in judgment. I was not basing this on any observation of such behavior. I was merely giving Seung possible excuses (alcohol was served and Mycroft was there). Seung was not drinking at the party.
See you on the ballfield! -Havelock
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Pennant Fever
Some of us have been giving some thought to the idea of a "team" pennant. Taking the 32 active players from the SFLOI trading cards, I ranked players on fielding, hitting and base running. Once ranked, eight "core four teams" were created by using the formula as below. Every other team was assigned to the same league and this is how the 2009 SFLOI Pennant would look.
Team assignment formula based on my subjective/semi-objective ranking:
32,1,16,17
31,2,15,18
30,3,14,19
29,4,13,20
28,5,12,21
27,6,11,22
26,7,10,23
25,8,9,24
Top two teams in each league could combine then "draft" four more players from their own league to form the two 12-man squad to face off in the World Series.
COHEN'S CONCOCTIONS #5
HARD TO WRITE ABOUT SUCH INFLEXIBLE SOFTNESS. A SUSPENDED STORY, UNRESOLVED
A ballplayer's impotence was to be kept secret, off the record. All the sports writers were in the know, but their sportsmanship of fair play kept their computers silent on this embarrassing subject. The ballplayer was well liked and respected. No journalist would break this benevolent conspiracy of silence about the ballplayer's chronic curse: the inability to get it up, not just keep it up, despite women's frantic but silkily sexy maneuvers to remedy his stubborn condition. Even women who were sex therapists tried their hand, but still, the ballplayer's shrunken bat never attained the requisite size to hit a line drive.
Medical science was put to the test--or testicle. Nothing worked. The ballplayer was a good fielder, a good hitter, a valuable member of a competing team. But gossip columns were silent about this eligible bachelor's non-linkage with the prominent or not name of any girlfriend.
An aspiring young sportswriter was about to be fired for writing not only dull but uninteresting articles covering the local team that the impotent ballplayer happened to be on. This desperate sportswriter's only chance of saving his job was to betray the unlucky ballplayer's sacred secret, thus breaking the code of silence that his colleague journalists had loyally held to. All the other journalists would jump in once the iron curtain was broken, like a snapped condom that allows sperm to rush through unhesitatingly, in a merry stampede that tramples the holding-back philosophy in riotous frenzy to give the sweet id something to pin a celebration on.
The ballplayer's shame would become common knowledge not just to the baseball community but to the vulgar celebrity world beyond, giving the public a new victim to play with while dangling merciful compassion before the bloodshot squints of his eyes.
The young sportswriter about to be fired would suffer contempt for breaking rank with his colleagues, but not ostracized from the hard-won journalistic profession. He and his wife were poor and expecting twins. Losing his job would be a sheer drop into poverty, as well as ambition assassination. His editor had dangled temptation that had irresistibility prominently embossed on it.
This story's writer ran out of potency to forge an ending. His typing fingers are all mushy soft, in low-pressured droop. He couldn't keep it up. But unlike the ballplayer, at least he was able stiffly to start what failed to be sustained to a spell-binding orgiastic length that keeps children hammered out with the bat to counter the spin the world puts on every wickedly pitched ball from its bag of mixed tricks. That's how the spinning world turns, challenging men's bats to keep it afloat with children batted out hard in collision with battered wombs.
Marvin Cohen is the author of several books including Baseball The Beautiful (1974) and a former creative writing teacher at the New School. Marvin plays first base for Softball For The Love Of It.
A ballplayer's impotence was to be kept secret, off the record. All the sports writers were in the know, but their sportsmanship of fair play kept their computers silent on this embarrassing subject. The ballplayer was well liked and respected. No journalist would break this benevolent conspiracy of silence about the ballplayer's chronic curse: the inability to get it up, not just keep it up, despite women's frantic but silkily sexy maneuvers to remedy his stubborn condition. Even women who were sex therapists tried their hand, but still, the ballplayer's shrunken bat never attained the requisite size to hit a line drive.
Medical science was put to the test--or testicle. Nothing worked. The ballplayer was a good fielder, a good hitter, a valuable member of a competing team. But gossip columns were silent about this eligible bachelor's non-linkage with the prominent or not name of any girlfriend.
An aspiring young sportswriter was about to be fired for writing not only dull but uninteresting articles covering the local team that the impotent ballplayer happened to be on. This desperate sportswriter's only chance of saving his job was to betray the unlucky ballplayer's sacred secret, thus breaking the code of silence that his colleague journalists had loyally held to. All the other journalists would jump in once the iron curtain was broken, like a snapped condom that allows sperm to rush through unhesitatingly, in a merry stampede that tramples the holding-back philosophy in riotous frenzy to give the sweet id something to pin a celebration on.
The ballplayer's shame would become common knowledge not just to the baseball community but to the vulgar celebrity world beyond, giving the public a new victim to play with while dangling merciful compassion before the bloodshot squints of his eyes.
The young sportswriter about to be fired would suffer contempt for breaking rank with his colleagues, but not ostracized from the hard-won journalistic profession. He and his wife were poor and expecting twins. Losing his job would be a sheer drop into poverty, as well as ambition assassination. His editor had dangled temptation that had irresistibility prominently embossed on it.
This story's writer ran out of potency to forge an ending. His typing fingers are all mushy soft, in low-pressured droop. He couldn't keep it up. But unlike the ballplayer, at least he was able stiffly to start what failed to be sustained to a spell-binding orgiastic length that keeps children hammered out with the bat to counter the spin the world puts on every wickedly pitched ball from its bag of mixed tricks. That's how the spinning world turns, challenging men's bats to keep it afloat with children batted out hard in collision with battered wombs.
Marvin Cohen is the author of several books including Baseball The Beautiful (1974) and a former creative writing teacher at the New School. Marvin plays first base for Softball For The Love Of It.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Winter Meeting Crime Scene
Ian, Sal & Seung,
Don did file a report of the theft of a gold glove to the NYPD. The cops said it was unlikely he would ever see it again.
P.S. A search of the home of Havelock Hewes only turned up a badly mangled "half" gold glove that could not be identified. The only markings were:
Da
Som
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Friday, March 5, 2010
Free pack SFLOI cards
For the first 15 attendees of this Sunday's Winter meeting there will be a free pack of SFLOI trading cards. Each pack contains 8 cards plus gum. Players can trade for their own card, their favorite SFLOI all-star or start their collection. One pack per attendee please and if you already own the entire set hands off! There will also be a limited number of full sets available for purchase at $25. All proceeds go to the SFLOI treasury.
Celebrate, it's Spring Training!
Monday, March 1, 2010
COHEN'S CONCOCTIONS #4
ABOVE THE LAW OF GRAVITY. INTRODUCING BETWEENNESS
The Law of Gravity was lawfully convicted of a crime so bad, I'm not allowed to reveal it here. May the reader's frustrated curiosity forgive me. The court made him pay an unspecified fine, and his other punishment was to be suspended for a crucial play in the deciding seventh game of the world series that coincidentally was to be played the very following night, between the Cubs and the Tigers. I'm not kidding, these things do and can happen. Anyway, to continue: It was the last half of the ninth inning, with the Cubs ahead, five to four. There were two outs with the potential tying run on first and the potential winning run at the plate. Speaking of tension!
Yes, the world series was in the balance. Excitement was at a frenzied height. That moment, two new records were set for television-watching, one nationally and one internationally. A breathtaking suspension, unreleased in its mounting intensity, worked its way through heart attacks. Audience suspension reflected the Law of Gravity's suspension, by court edict, that was about to be enacted, on the field itself. The Tiger batter lifted a towering fly ball toward the distant bleacher barrier, just far enough to be indeterminate whether it would be a game ending homer or a game ending catch by the outfielder, who waited with an anxiously upheld glove eagerly wide open in professionally concentrated anticipation.
Under suspension, the Law of Gravity was legally helpless to enact itself, so the well-batted ball kept its suspended height at that undetermined length of play. It seemed like a mathematical puzzler from on high. How would it be measured? By an expert professional measurer whose airborne skills were put into play by an instantly rented helicopter put into service only for this occasion, but whatever the expense it was by all measures worth it.
Was it a game winning homerun or a game winning put-out? Or to put it another way, was it a game losing homerun or a game losing out? That depended on whose point of view it was. It's not an absolute world, it's a relative world. Beyond dispute, you can depend on this, by all absolute means.
The outcome? I leave the faithful reader in a bewilderment of suspense, which I share with him, so we're in the same boat, or in this case helicopter. My apologies that this twisted enigma remains unresolved through authorial indecision, or sadism, or abrupt bloodless withdrawal, or sheer disinterestedness, having made my point, though it's a blunt point, now a diffused point, spread out into just bland blankness, ended with cowardly or bored indifference, a let-down; or an abandonment of the writer-reader contract, which I never signed anyway, so it too is hereby under suspension, like an eternally lofted fly ball poised between win and loss, between two teams, between the bleacher section and the playing field, in that world-compelling area of Betweenness, much commented and debated upon.
Marvin Cohen is the author of several books including Baseball The Beautiful (1974) and a former creative writing teacher at the New School. Marvin plays first base for Softball For The Love Of It.
The Law of Gravity was lawfully convicted of a crime so bad, I'm not allowed to reveal it here. May the reader's frustrated curiosity forgive me. The court made him pay an unspecified fine, and his other punishment was to be suspended for a crucial play in the deciding seventh game of the world series that coincidentally was to be played the very following night, between the Cubs and the Tigers. I'm not kidding, these things do and can happen. Anyway, to continue: It was the last half of the ninth inning, with the Cubs ahead, five to four. There were two outs with the potential tying run on first and the potential winning run at the plate. Speaking of tension!
Yes, the world series was in the balance. Excitement was at a frenzied height. That moment, two new records were set for television-watching, one nationally and one internationally. A breathtaking suspension, unreleased in its mounting intensity, worked its way through heart attacks. Audience suspension reflected the Law of Gravity's suspension, by court edict, that was about to be enacted, on the field itself. The Tiger batter lifted a towering fly ball toward the distant bleacher barrier, just far enough to be indeterminate whether it would be a game ending homer or a game ending catch by the outfielder, who waited with an anxiously upheld glove eagerly wide open in professionally concentrated anticipation.
Under suspension, the Law of Gravity was legally helpless to enact itself, so the well-batted ball kept its suspended height at that undetermined length of play. It seemed like a mathematical puzzler from on high. How would it be measured? By an expert professional measurer whose airborne skills were put into play by an instantly rented helicopter put into service only for this occasion, but whatever the expense it was by all measures worth it.
Was it a game winning homerun or a game winning put-out? Or to put it another way, was it a game losing homerun or a game losing out? That depended on whose point of view it was. It's not an absolute world, it's a relative world. Beyond dispute, you can depend on this, by all absolute means.
The outcome? I leave the faithful reader in a bewilderment of suspense, which I share with him, so we're in the same boat, or in this case helicopter. My apologies that this twisted enigma remains unresolved through authorial indecision, or sadism, or abrupt bloodless withdrawal, or sheer disinterestedness, having made my point, though it's a blunt point, now a diffused point, spread out into just bland blankness, ended with cowardly or bored indifference, a let-down; or an abandonment of the writer-reader contract, which I never signed anyway, so it too is hereby under suspension, like an eternally lofted fly ball poised between win and loss, between two teams, between the bleacher section and the playing field, in that world-compelling area of Betweenness, much commented and debated upon.
Marvin Cohen is the author of several books including Baseball The Beautiful (1974) and a former creative writing teacher at the New School. Marvin plays first base for Softball For The Love Of It.
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